CBC - Origins

Part Three - Got To Keep On Movin'  (by: Darrin ©06/2005)

Terry kept them walking until the sun was just dipping into the horizon, then he had D gather some firewood while he set up the little pup tent and the rest of their camp. As she did, she kept him in sight the entire time, bringing back a few branches at a time until there was a healthy pile next to the stone circle he had put together.

From the moment they had left the plane, Darrin had walked dutifully next to Terry, her hand in his, not saying a word. Terry wasn't sure if it was because she couldn't or wouldn't. She didn't complain or wonder when they were going to stop for the picnic, just kept walking as long as he was. However, when he stopped to relieve himself against a nearby tree, she'd refused to let go of his hand. Terry had to laugh a little as she turned away from seeing him unzip and then pee, but was equally concerned at how much tighter her grip became as soon as she did. He asked her if she needed to go and she shook her head. He didn't believe her, but with the fearful look in her eyes, didn't press the issue.

Once they reached the area Terry decided would make a good campsite, he pried D's fingers from his hand, hoping her increased breathing wouldn't result in another series of screams once he did get her to let go of him. He spoke to her reassuringly the whole time, telling her he needed two hands to make their picnic nice and eventually she calmed down a little. Giving her something to do helped as well.

He got them a dinner together, heating up the food over the fire and they ate in silence.

When she spoke, he was stunned.

"NOT stupid," she whispered hoarsely.

"Pardon, luv?"

"I'm NOT stupid," she repeated, her voice still as quiet. She'd really done a number on her throat, he realized.

"No one said you were, luv. I'd never think that, you know that."

"He did."

As always, Terry was quick to work out what she meant. "Ben?"

"He laughed at me. Told me I was stupid. Couldn't take care of myself. Couldn't stop what happened."

Terry didn't think they were speaking of the plane crash anymore. He reached out and caressed her cheek gently. It was becoming pretty clear to him why she'd disowned her parents.

"It wasn't your job to stop it, luv. It should never have happened. But it was never your fault and you aren't stupid."

D looked at him, gratitude and yet disbelief in her eyes. Terry smiled at her and she turned to look out into the forest, dark now with night having fallen. She looked like she was listening to something.

"D?" Darrin turned back to him and shook her head a little. "We need to get some sleep, luv. You okay to sleep? Need the lav or anything?"

She nodded, blushing and they went over to a tree a little ways from the camp, Terry promising her he'd keep watch. Once back, he left the fire going and got her into the little bed he'd made for her inside the tent, stretching himself out next to her. She turned to him and curled around his body, clinging tight. His arm went around her automatically and soon he felt her relax and her breathing even out into sleep.

As he always did before falling asleep, he went over what had happened during the day and planning out what needed to be done tomorrow. He felt he'd made good decisions when it came to keeping Darrin sane, while at the same time worrying about the "conversation" she'd had with the dead steward. Finally, he thought about her behaviour and that she seemed to be accepting everything they'd had to do this afternoon and evening and decided that she did know reality from delusion, albeit that she hadn't acknowledged that Ben talking to her wasn't real, she also hadn't fought him on the walk and the camp, which told him she knew their situation and was probably just preoccupied with her scare.

He reached for his phone, checking one more time before closing his eyes. Still no signal. He wondered where the fuck they were that could be this signal-less for this long. Closing his eyes, he was briefly grateful his cracked ribs were on the side that Darrin wasn't clinging to. She had a helluva grip on him.

~*~

Five days passed without incident. Well, nothing Terry hadn't expected. They walked, camped and Terry kept checking his phone for a signal. He was hoping that by now the wreckage had been located and that there was a search party out for them, but also still felt they needed to keep moving to find a way to contact Dino, just in case.

The food was holding out pretty well, although Terry had begun supplementing their supplies by having "lunch on the forest", finding various berries and other plants they could snack on for the noon meal. Darrin did everything he told her to, although largely silent. But he'd begun to notice an odd thing she'd do.

When he'd stop to take a leak, she'd stand there, now not always needing his hand to remain in hers, and look as if she was listening to something. He couldn't hear anything unusual and began to worry she was still having some sort of delusion. He'd call to her when he was done and she'd perk up right away, but there'd be a few seconds where he'd see a faraway look in her eye often accompanied with a little frown as if she, too, was trying to figure out what she was hearing. When he asked her about it, she just looked at him, without responding.

And then there were the night terrors. Terry had been fully prepared for those, though. Every night she'd wake up screaming, begging someone to shut up, to stop tormenting her, to just leave her alone. Terry pulled her into his arms and would calm her down, telling her quietly over and over that it was just a dream, not real, just a normal reaction to her scare. That it was okay, he understood and she would be fine. That he was there and always would be and she didn't have to be scared anymore. It would take a long while, but eventually she would stop crying and fall back to sleep.

Their progress was slow given all of these factors and Terry's injury. He was beginning to feel better, nothing a few days on a beach wouldn't hurt, he thought with a grin. He was kind of enjoying this forced vacation though and Darrin's compliant nature and holding her hand through their walks was good. He wondered though, if she would ever be like she was before. He doubted it highly. He'd seen people change drastically after trauma and regardless of the fact that she hadn't been physically hurt, he knew something had deeply affected her during those hours she'd spent screaming, all alone, with no one to comfort her and let her know it wasn't real. He didn't think she would ever believe anyone if they did tell her it hadn't been real. And quite frankly, as much as it may go against proper diagnostics, he didn't want anyone telling her it was anything different than what she remembered. She'd been through enough not to have to deal with being told she'd lost it. He wasn't sure why he felt that way though. Maybe something had changed in him too, but he found himself growing more and more protective of D.

He'd begun thinking of her as D as well. It was just easier. She wasn't the same woman anymore, that was certain. The first time she called him T instead of Terry that second night by the campfire, he'd kept grinning all night. He liked it. It fit with how he had begun thinking of her.

On the morning of the sixth day, however, something happened that made Terry start thinking that maybe something more was going on. He didn't believe in any of that surreal bullshit like telepathy or supernatural paranormal crap like that. If he could sense it with one of his five senses, it existed, everything else was hearsay.

So when D stopped in the middle of helping him close up the tent and turned away from him, he just figured she was having another one of her "listening" moments and called to her. This time, though, she ignored him and actually answered back.

"No, T says how we go and he doesn't want to go in your direction."

"D, who are you talking to?" D's head snapped towards him and she blushed. "Luv, come on, you weren't talking to me, who was it?"

"I--I don't know his name," she said softly as if she'd been found out. "But he's very naughty," she added with a conspiratorial whisper.

"Why? What's he saying to you?" Terry was completely non-plussed and really didn't know what else to say.

"He says he's getting very impatient and that we need to be traveling that way," she pointed in a direction more southeast from the direction Terry had been walking them in. "He says that he's been waiting quite long enough and we should have been there already." This last she said with a dip of her head and another blush which made Terry think that if she really was in communication with someone, they'd probably not said it as politely as that.

Terry took a deep breath and counted to ten. To say he was more than a little irritated was putting it mildly. He'd been following all the protocols he knew for getting them out of trouble and here she was, a complete stranger to hiking, let alone rescue work, trying to tell him which direction they should be going in. And using a delusion to do so.

Calm down, mate, he told himself. Look at her. She's not bein' cute, she really believes what she's sayin'. Besides, what harm can it do? Not like you've had any luck so far.

"Okay, luv," he said gently. "We'll try that direction, today, all right? Can't hurt."

The smile on her face was the biggest and happiest one he'd seen in a very long time and it diffused his anger completely. On the heels of that though, he wondered how long she'd been "listening" to this bloke trying to tell her what to do and hoped it wasn't fucking with her head any more than she had already had it fucked with.

When they were ready to head out, D tucked her hand into Terry's and then tip-toed up and kissed him on the cheek with a little giggle as she pulled away. Terry smiled down at her and decided she must have been "hearing" from this bloke for quite awhile.

~*~

The thing with the dreams, Darrin decided, was that they were so fucking real. If it weren't for T telling her they were just dreams, she would have gotten lost in them nights ago. She really didn't understand what was happening to her, though. T was acting as if this were all normal and par for the course and whereas she felt comforted by his lack of concern, she herself was becoming more and more disturbed by the things going on inside her head. She was completely convinced Ben had taunted her for hours as she screamed at him, begging him to stop. She was equally convinced that the voice she kept hearing in her head belonged to an actual someone and was not a figment of her imagination. She'd seen the look in T's eyes when she'd first confessed to hearing this voice and was scared at first he was going to lose his temper about it. When he'd accepted the change in course and done so gently, the relief that had washed over her had caused her to kiss him, albeit on the cheek.

With T's help, she was feeling like she could actually come out on the other side of whatever this was she was going through. She knew she was being overly dependent on him but she also knew that if she let go of him she'd start screaming again and this time maybe not stop. It felt that close to the surface, the need to scream and keep on screaming. There were moments throughout the day she could feel herself begin to shake and couldn't stop. Moments when all she wanted to do was crawl into T's lap and stay there forever. Sometimes she wondered if he was beginning to resent how dependent she was on him. But it wasn't enough to get her to stop.

You can depend on me, Darrin...

It always made her jump when he spoke to her like that, out of the blue but so in tune with what she was thinking. Like he had just taken up permanent residence inside her head.

She wondered if she would ever have a sane thought again.

~*~

Four more days had gone by when they reached the clearing. It was huge. In the distance, they could see the ocean. Terry pulled his phone open in a hurry.

"Oh, thank FUCK," he said and hit Dino's speed dial at the same time.

D wandered away from him and he was so consumed with giving Dino as much information as possible in case the signal died, that it almost escaped him she had let go of his hand.

You're here...Come to me....

Darrin slowly walked over towards where she felt the voice was coming from.

Nothing but empty ground.

T called to her and said they would set up camp. She wanted to sleep where she was standing and asked him if they could. He said yes.

They made camp and the two of them sat staring at the fire as the sun set. T was elated and told her everything Dino had said, that he'd be there in the morning, he'd locked onto his GPS signal and everything would be all right.

D smiled.

She just didn't know how she was going to explain to T that she would never be leaving this place they'd found.

Wait until he sees what you'll have for him in the morning...